I Reject the feminist label

Latest supporter submission:

I am not a feminist even though I know that not all feminists are man-haters, don’t care about men’s rights, or believe in female superiority
Because I do not want to be a part of a group that includes too many people who do believe any of the above.

I am not a feminist even though I know that some dictionaries define feminism simply as “equality”
Because I do not want to be a part of a movement where too many of their actions do not match this definition.

I am not a feminist even though I know that some feminist movements have fought for gender equity and helped give women the same rights as men
Because I do not want to be a part of the current movement that includes unjust ideas like “rape culture.”

I Reject the feminist label even though I agree with some things the feminist movement stands for
Because I disagree with enough of the beliefs and actions of the current feminist movement, such that applying the label to myself would give people the wrong impression of what I support and believe in.

I reject the current feminist movement even if it fights for equity, tries to stop sexism, and provide opportunities to those that have none
Because it is not the only way or the best way to achieve these goals

I reject the feminist label even though I am a middle-aged, educated, intelligent woman
Because being labelled a feminist would misrepresent who I really am.

 

TD

21 Comments on “I Reject the feminist label”

  1. Why reject the whole idea of feminism just because of a few extremists in the ranks? I don’t think most feminists are as you describe. Do you give up on your religion or political beliefs because of a few extremists? of course not, most movements have an extremist element.

    • First of all I didn’t say that I reject the “whole idea of feminism,” just the feminist label and the current movement. I also didn’t say that I rejected it because of a “few extremists.” I said I rejected it because there are TOO MANY members who have beliefs different from my own. It’s not just the (extremist) outliers that I do not agree with, but more and more middle-of-the-curve feminists as well. And yes, I would give up my affiliation (but not my beliefs) with a religious group or political movement if I felt that too many of its members were no longer representing my beliefs.

      • Although I understand your discretion toward being labeled and confined to a division within society, this is not what the feminist movement is about. In recognizing and respecting that you have different views from me I am learning more about who I am and what I can do to improve as an individual. Therefore, by rejecting others who disagree with your viewpoint on Feminism you are disregarding the beauty in opposition. The truth is, opposition does not need to be combative but rather a platform for creating further understanding.

      • I understand where you are coming from in regard to the “extremist feminist” that the media tends to draw attention toward. However, by not wanting to look past the extreme examples within the media, you are refusing to see the righteousness this movement stands for- equality. Also, it can be profoundly unjust to stereotype any group within society, whether you agree with feminism or not.

        • And of course, feminists are never guilty of stereotyping anyone, are they? That’s part of the problem. Instead of railing at “people who don’t understand” or those who you believe have got you all wrong, why not look homeward at those who are causing your movement to have this image problem and do a little PR? It is not the responsibility of either men or non-feminist women, i.e. the very people your movement is so fond of stereotyping and blithely dismissing, to do it for you. If you want people to understand, then I suggest you do some cleansing within your movement. Why should those of us who don’t buy into your philosophy, those of us on the receiving end of your rotten tomatoes, give a flying you-know-what about how misunderstood you apparently all are? How about trying to understand that we are all at a disadvantage somewhere? It’s about time you all understood that you cannot gain without losing something in the process and that crocodile tears do not equate with sensitivity. It’s all gimme, gimme, gimme and that’s why your movement goes down like a lead balloon – it has nothing to do with others’ failure to grasp your essence.

          • Every fucking time. I say I’m not a feminist hoards of feminists come wailing in “You need to look up the definition of feminism!” “Those aren’t REAL feminists though!” These aren’t good excuses. If they’re not “real feminists” then no ones ever doing anything to put them down except those who aren’t a feminist.Real feminists never do anything to hush em up, know why? Because none of them are actually “real feminists.” As for the dictionary, Actions > Words.

            Emma Watson is a joke.

            Feminists care more about people subscribing to their movement than they do about actual real world problems. That’s why they do constant damage control, and define their definition a thousand times over. I guess it’s true what they say, if you repeat a lie long enough people will start to think it’s the truth.

      • We do not live in a rape culture. We live in the western world. Rape culture exists in Muslim countries, prisons (men’s prisons to be exact), and within illegal immigration systems.

        When feminists protest against rape culture, they mean rape culture within Western society (Because I assure you Muslims in Pakistan don’t give a f#ck what feminists here are doing.)

        A rape culture is a culture where rape is glorified. We do not glorify rape here, if someone has been accused of rape and there is actual evidence to back up this accusation then the rapists is sent to prison, often with harsh sentences.

        So tell me again, how exactly are we living in a rape culture if rapists are sent to prison, there are hundreds upon hundreds of shelters and recovery centers for rape VICTIMS, and public media always shuns those who are accused of rape — whether they are innocent or not.

  2. So as a middle aged and intelligent woman, are you saying you are no longer a feminist or wish to no longer be included in the overall feminist movement because some members no longer represent what you believe in? I think you need to define what true feminism is and the ACTUAL aim of feminism instead of the media-sensualised minority of feminists before you put many young and growing women off the entire cause. If you are really as intelligent and experienced as you say you are, you would know better.

    • I love how feminists argue with the whole “no means no” thing, and yet if a woman says they do not wish to label themselves a feminist, then feminists refuse to let her have that opinion — No means no!

  3. I would like to know why women who voice their beliefs and assert statements about themselves are attacked by feminists and doubt their intelligence. Are not feminists supposed to be for women and women’s choice? Or are they simply for women who believe exactly as they do? Cannot a feminist tolerate a grown woman’s opinion that she no longer agrees with the current feminist movement? Is feminism a sacred fact of life that we must all bow down to or is it an ever-changing human-made political movement? Cannot we tolerate disagreement? Are we not adults? Do we not respect each other? Must we all conform? Cannot someone believe in equality without the feminist label? Please consider these questions. Thank you.

  4. Some people claim that “as a middle aged and intelligent woman” TD “should know better” than to judge a group for a faction of its followers. However, if a majority of its members have changed to fit the new definition that feminism itself has changed.

    It is the same as the definition of “gay”. Gay used to describe one’s attitude; it now describes one’s sexual orientation. This is all due to how people use it. People are the ones who change the definition of things, and modern feminists have done the same to the feminist movement.

    Feminists used to stand for equal rights. Now feminists call for identical treatment for men and women. Men and women are scientifically different, with different urges and instincts. Women should defiantly have the same legal rights, but should we be treated exactly as a man is? I think not.

  5. I understand that your point of view is that feminism can be extreme and even destructive to modern society in your blog. Your underlying belief to support this point of view is that feminism and gender equality are not one and the same. This modern definition of feminism that you are rejecting says that feminism is anti – men or at least that it is promoting women above men. I think these man-haters that believe in female superiority are in fact not feminists. They are are new class that deserve the label of “feminist”. Let’s remember that feminism has a proud history political and social movements. Wikipedia defines feminism as having the goal of “political, economic, personal, and social rights for women that are equal to those of men.” When you reject feminism, you are rejecting a Women’s movement that changed Western society including the right to a no fault divorce, right to make individual decisions regarding pregnancy, right to own property, and access to university education. More recently, Emma Watson, actress and creator of the “He for She” campaign, has spoke to the United Nations about getting back to the original definition of feminism. 753,000 people have signed up to support her campaign so the idea that feminism is about equality is picking up steam. The word is still alienating to many, evidenced by the fact that only 19% of people said that they identify as a feminist in a October 2013 research study by YouGov, while 81% of people agreed that women and men should be equal in every way in society. What is needed now is more voices like Emma Watson and her followers supporting the true meaning of feminism rather than the outright rejection of the label you are advocating.

  6. I understand your point of view on feminism. You make it very clear that you are not a feminist and that you reject the feminist label. By rejecting feminism, you are avoiding the ways it has impacted many lives in this country. I know that you may reject the current feminist movement, however it looks to me that you don’t understand the entire meaning of the current feminist movement. By avoiding other extreme examples in social media, you are therefore rejecting that the word feminism is defined “equality” in the dictionary definition. Being a feminist is the act of supporting the equal rights of men and women. In your article, it looks as if you know enough about feminism to where you could practically be one. We might as well beg you to be one at this point. According to “Feminist Magazine,” 94% of all the writing awards at the Oscars have gone to men. Wouldn’t you want women to strive to be successful rather than getting let down when men have always been statistically more successful? In a feminist blog called “Guerrilla Girls,” they state that they support feminism with many facts, humor, and visuals. These girls feel that their argument is strongly supported by many other big sites such as The Washington Post and The New York Times. At the end of the day, you need to look at the bigger picture and give other people a chance. You need to observe beyond other perspectives, as you are not doing in this written piece.

  7. I understand your point of view. But the reasons you listed are part of the reason why I AM a feminist. Feminism has always been about equal rights for everyone – in recent years, with newer knowledge about more genders, it’s expanded to include every gender. Yeah, there are some people who don’t understand it – they are the ones who are extremists and militant and spew hatred. But there are others, like me, like you, who believe in the true definition of feminism. I understand your rejection of it, but the movement really needs more people like us to bring it back to what it’s supposed to be.

    • No one here believes “the true definition of feminism.” You clearly don’t understand the rejection of it after all.

    • Like someone else already said, I just love how when some people don’t want to be a feminist hoardes of feminists come in trying to convert us to- I mean change our minds. “That’s not the REAL definition of feminism!!!” Yeah we don’t care. Actions speak louder than words. We don’t want to be involved in something so dirty.

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